Friday, February 10, 2012

Beware The Toxic Friend

 It's been a little over a year now since a very toxic person left my life.

 This acquaintance of mine had me at the pliability of putty, I was a sorry sight indeed.

 And going this long without them in my life, I have NEVER been happier.

 Each one of us, at some point in our life, has had a friend or relative, perhaps family member who hasn't been all that great for us. Though the circumstances in which we encounter them or befriend them may be different, in almost every case we later feel we could have done without.

Have you ever wondered if you have one? Please, ask yourself these questions:

When hanging out with the person in question, do you...

...start feeling down about yourself?
...find yourself inadvertently gossiping?

...notice the conversation often shifting from your problems to their own?
...feel they often take over the conversation, leaving you no time to reply or respond?

...feel yourself more obligated to hang out rather than wanting to for the fun of it?
...constantly seem to be giving to them more in the friendship than receiving?

...tell a story or something about yourself, only for them to try and one-up it?
...leave the conversation feeling drained, maybe even stressed?

If you answered yes to a few of these then odds are you may have a toxic friend on your hands. Now, don't get me wrong, not all friends who do this are toxic, they might just be a little too into the current conversation or situation, but if you notice the above occurrences happening a little too often for it to be a coincidence you may want to step back and evaluate what you've gotten yourself into.

It's great to have a friend, even better if the bond between you both is close and on good terms. We'll always be required to go through a rough bout or two in friendships, but one thing to remember is that if a friend is leaving you with a heavy heart you ought to take the time and speak to them about it, before it hurts you. It's okay to give a little more than necessary sometimes, but once a friendship becomes more of a habit than a healthy and fun experience you may need to consider distancing yourself from the individual.

Let's put ourselves first in keeping up our health to have happy and fulfilling friendships.

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